How to Prepare a Child for a Divorce?
Family is the main thing in a person’s life. It is important for everyone to be surrounded by close people. When we say “family,” we mean different things. This is a loved one and children. Someone finds a family in the relatives of the spouse, in the family of brothers or sisters.
In the center of the world, almost all of their surroundings. The atmosphere of the house affects the development, forms the character. It is always stress, frustration and pain.
You need to understand that a child is never identified with the separation of mom and dad. Even in situations where father and son need difficult months to sort things out, scream, cry. The feeling of relief associated with the departure of the immoral member from the family occurs only after a series of unrest and stress.
Half cannot be negative, not negative. If the parents themselves cannot help the child, then you should consult a psychologist. He will tell you how to prepare your child for a divorce of parents.
The Atmosphere in Family During Divorce Process
Divorce is always accompanied by clarification of relations, quarrels, misunderstanding. Very rarely, people peacefully agree to break family ties. Often one of the spouses does not want to get divorced, trying to keep the other. The atmosphere in the family is always tense or scandals, or indifference. Children are very sensitive to such moods and it is very difficult to completely hide the negative from them.
But try to smooth out the situation is necessary. You can’t find out the relationship with children, especially with raised tones. Even babies who do not understand the meaning of screams feel the mood and this greatly affects them. In addition, newborns have a very strong connection with their mother, if she is upset or depressed, the baby will feel it. Stress and tantrums can worsen the quality of breast milk or cause it to disappear.
Even if you are just discussing problems, older children can hear and understand that there is a discord in the family. If you are only discussing the likelihood of a divorce and there is a chance of maintaining a family, children may misinterpret everything and get upset in vain. If you decide to postpone the story of the child about the divorce, and he found out ahead of time, then the baby will begin to ponder the situation and come to false conclusions.
When it is Better to File for Divorce?
You need to choose the right moment. Tell the children only after they have definitely decided to disperse, when all the ways to save the family have already been tried.
Psychologists advise choosing the time depending on the age of the child. In the case of babies, it’s better to tell them at the very last moment before the divorce. For them, the perception of time is different, a week can last like a month, negative emotions will stretch and it will be more difficult for them to survive this stress. It is better for adolescents to inform parents about their decision in advance so that they can prepare mentally. The sudden news can dread them, cause an inadequate reaction.
The consequences of parental divorce for teens
Psychologists advise during the divorce period to try to find additional activities or hobbies for teenagers so that they have less free time. Some parents believe that children 14 to 18 years of age are more comfortable that their parents are filing for divorce, they do not need to be prepared for this event. This is not true. A teenager can more adequately assess the situation, understand the true causes and goals of divorce.
Boys without parental attention can study poorly, contact the wrong company. During this period, male upbringing is very important for them, not all problems can already be addressed to the mother. And the father’s departure from the family reduces the time and frequency of his communication with his son.